What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

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They say those with anti-humour are the wisest.

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What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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Men, get on the boat.

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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What's the difference between a duck

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Nippies

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What did one paper bill say to the other? Did you hear about one of us getting replaced by a woman? It's like Bruce to Caitlyn!

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Womans profesional lacrosse

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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