what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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roses ar red vilots ar blue i have hiv

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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