What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Whats worse than 1 bee sting... 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings... The hollacaust Whats worse than the hollacaust... 3 BEE STINGS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -41

wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

there was a tomatoes and it blew up and died. Why did it blow up? The Nazi's needed ketchup for there Jew Burgers

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Why was the T-Rex so bad at math? Cause it was stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +48

knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops