Why did Jane get pregnant Because she bought a man's semen and put it in her vagina.

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why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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What is it called when a whole bunch of black people run down a hill? A race.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

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Why did i write this? I was bored

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A black guy walks up to the cash register at a gas station with his hands in his pockets... He pulls out a 5 dollar bill and buys a pack of gum.

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what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

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An asian, black man and a white guy are stranded in a desert with no food and no water, so what do they do Die

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Yo mamma is so old that she died.

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roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

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Hitler, Goebbels and Göring walked into a bar. They ordered 3 steins and took their seats in quiet corner of the establishment. After short deliberation they were ready to start work on building a highway that would be the envy of the world.

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kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

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person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops