whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Penis.

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Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

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An Englishman, and Irishman, and a Scottsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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Why did Robert fall off his bike?? Because he was a potato.

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 was convicted of a murder, but was released due to lack of evidence, and 6 is very concerned for the protection of himself and his growing family.

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. Good.

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Knock Knock whose there? ach ach who? bless you

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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What's harder nailing 10 babies to 1 tree... Or nailing 1 baby to 10 trees???

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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