why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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heyy emit chase wazzup

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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if Ruddell was gay what would he be? A gay prick!

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What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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