- Anti Joke

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

When you hit an animal Realize your out of your mind Then realize the animals mind is over there in the ditch.

What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

How did my grand parents go about surviving the holocaust? Well, for starters, they weren't Jewish, they never lived in Germany, and to be honest, my grandparents probably would have supported the Nazi's because they are right wing pricks

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people