What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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What do Elephants and Grapes have in common? They are both purple, except the Elephant.

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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Q. If your rowing a canoe up a tree, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A. None because snakes don't have armpits.

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

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How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the blond couldn't put a piece of meat into her mouth? Because she was vegetarian.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

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What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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