Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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Why did the Koala Fall out of the tree, It was Dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops