jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

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How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

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why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

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What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Deadly cancer.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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Why did Gus go to the HC? Because he got high off his ass.

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whats are the similarities between a dolphin and a bus? they both have wheels, aside from the dolphin. it does not,

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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