Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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what did the horse say after the man told him to have a good day? nothing, horses dont talk.(:

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

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What's the difference between a duck

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Why do you put a baby in a blender face up? To see the expression on its face

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A thin man walks into a Grocery Store. He trips, hits his head and is killed instantly. There are several children present and they are scarred for life.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Wanna see some more?

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NASCAR

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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black guy graduating high school

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

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Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops