Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

black guy graduating high school

Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

Flying aboriginal on a magic carpet

guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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