A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

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Why? Whats wrong?

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What's worse than 10 babies in one trash can? One baby in 10 trash cans.

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a terrorist.

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What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

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John Rustenburg at the dinner table

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How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

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0 + 0 = 0

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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Keep up the fun Nero!

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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