What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

-_- i like trains ... -_-

A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

girls basketball

what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

How did the Joker get away? Because the Batmobile lost a wheel.

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

The red guy lives in the red house, the green guy lives in the green house, and the blue guy lives in the blue house. Who lives in the white house? The purple guy, he just hasn't painted his house yet.

A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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