Strawberries!

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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Women's rights.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

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When u r using ur computer and then all the sudden it says reload and something about an error blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .. ......blah blah blah. Blah blah. Your response: "AWWWWW BITCH ASS FUCK U"......*LEAVES ROOM*..... (HOUR LATER)*COMES BACK IN THE ROOM* "Oh hey, Meet my bff she is from your version of Hell her name is , Vir-is (virus) anyways Vir-is wanted to have sex with u and probably give u a USB Transmitted Disease A.K.A. virus then wwhile u r rebooting Vir-is and I is gonna kill u Toodles

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I'm Color Blind F*CK

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What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

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Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

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a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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