A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

Why do black people sit so far back in their seats? Because they're used to sitting in the back of the bus

Their, they're, there You're, your

You're Adopted.

What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

what do you do to get a guy to vomit?? kick him in the balls!

Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...