What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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whats the difference between my mom and your mom nothing they are both sluts

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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An Asian fails their maths exam.

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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knock knock who's there interupting black woman interu- MMMMHHHHHMMMM

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I pooped my pants

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What do you get if you buy a big mac with a ten pound note? Change.

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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