Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

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What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

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O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

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whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

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Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? "THE chicken" indicates a definite article, you really would have to specify which chicken you're talking about so i can identify whether i was there at the given moment that the chicken tried to cross the road and to ask it his reason for attempting it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops