What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

Knock, Knock Come in

Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

A blind man walks into a pole.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

knock knock. come in.

Answer The Following!! Q: How Do You Kill Bee?? Q: What Do You Call A Bee Who Live In America?? Q: Why Don't You Give Elsa A Balloon??

Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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