What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Michael Brown

Nicolas Cage's acting.

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

Knock, Knock Come in

Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

Aodhan peanut head Hearty

Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...