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You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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Maturity is a virtue.

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Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

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whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

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0123456789

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What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops