What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

mark is mark

What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? You don't call him anything... You call for help.

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

It burns when I pee sometimes.

Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

What's worse than having a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

matty russel are you on here

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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