A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is Megan Fox's middle name? Denise

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

thumb_up thumb_down +25

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

i cant think of one.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Eduardo cross the road. The same reason he crossed the border.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops