Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Aodhan peanut head Hearty

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

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Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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Women.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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Your mom is so hairy that she must not feel comfortable in her everyday life.

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What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

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Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

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What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

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Why do African-American people like fried chicken and watermelon? Because they are delicious food items.

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What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops