What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

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Mitt Romney penis

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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