Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

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Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

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there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

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A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

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matt f stupid because no one likes him

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

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What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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