What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

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I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

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How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

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What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

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There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesnt mean their not there...

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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