My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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banana

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Why did the Koala Fall out of the tree, It was Dead

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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