Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Barack Obama.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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