Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Hi

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Poop

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9/11

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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