No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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why did the man die? because he died.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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