What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

yeah..

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

who drinks pee? katness

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

lol

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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