What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

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why did the man die? because he died.

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What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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