Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's brown and sticky? A penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

JFK

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -164

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

I'm so hungry I could eat food

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

who drinks pee? katness

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops