Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road Because he was Pierre preasured by all you assholes Saying he already did it so now he feels like he Has to do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

donald................duck for president

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

squirrels playing in the street=dez bryant playing tennis

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

ME NAME IS JEFF

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops