Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

An Irishman walks out of a bar

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

Why can't the man have babies? His nuts was cut off and he eventually bleed to death.

Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

A boy has enough money to buy an xbox and a game, but when he reaches the store he is no longer able to buy an xbox and a game, how is this possible? He didnt really have enough money to buy an xbox and a game.

Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

Where do pimps go when they retire? Idaho.

What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

Q: A Blonde and a Brunette fall of a building which one hits the ground first? A: The Brunette because she ways 200 pounds and the Blonde weighs 100.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...