Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

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Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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There's a car about to hit me.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

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You're Adopted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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