What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

your mom died.

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

What is the best kind of necro? Dead necro.

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

Wanna hear a joke? No.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

soccor

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

a man walks into a bar... it was a crow-bar

No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

Where's my baby??

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...