A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

stevie wonder watched a movie yesterday

Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

Two english guys meet at work

Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

roses are red viloits are blue Bernard is hot but then i led to you

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

Chuck Norris' punch is so powerful that is falls on the downward slope of the bell curve for punch force of adult males.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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