Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

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if Ruddell was gay what would he be? A gay prick!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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