Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems show me your boobs

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead why did the dog fall out of the tree? because it was attached to the monkey

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

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This sentence is false.

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what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

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Why did the jew die Really...

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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