What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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What is cold? Winter

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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im a dragon, no im not

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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