I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

Oh no! My life is ruined!

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

knock knock who's there aids

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

What did the Russian scientist say to the British scientist when he saw two black guys enter a strip club? "Two black guys entered the strip club"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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