What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A nugget

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An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well, he graduated in 4 years with a degree in chemical engineering due to his diligence and good work ethic. He now has a well paying job that allows him to support his wife and two kids and to pay the mortgage on their large home.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

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The last time I heard that joke, I fell off my pet single celled bacteria.

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roses are red violets are blue you might think i can write poems but, bit i really really can't

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Why didn't Sally make it to school on time? She got savagely beaten and raped.

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There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

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What's a cow's favorite vacation spot? the slaughterhouse.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Q. who's george porchy?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

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Whats the worst part of Chemotharapy? The Cancer.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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five high school freshmen get into a car on a Friday.They are too busy looking forward to the weekend that they speed into oncoming traffic and all die in a horrible collision.

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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What did the Chinaman say to the other Chinaman? I dont know, he was speaking in Chinese.

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What did the man say when he saw a purple cow? Nothing. He was blind.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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