Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

What's funnier than 24? 25

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

There is a black guy, British guy, and a Spanish guy in a room. Wait that'll never happen, black people hate Spanish people.

What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

why was the boy sad...because scooby doo shot him with a harpoon

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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