What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

Today is May 18 2016.

a man walks into a bar... it was a crow-bar

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

Chicken penis.

I walked into my maths lesson and my teacher told me to point out the uncommon variable. ..So i pointed at the ginger black man in the corner.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? One has a penis, and one has a vagina.

Women.

Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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