What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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luke moore cant pull it back

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Roey Jegen

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Why did the samurai commit Sepuku? Because it is an honorable Japanese tradition.

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How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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shea kisses a girl

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Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

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1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

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Women's rights.

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What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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