roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

vagina, hehehehehehehe

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

A midget walks under a bar

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

if x marks the spot, what does y do? y does the laundry.

My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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