What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

who can beat up superman doomsday, duh, he killed him

What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

BOOBALANBOO

Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

Why did the guy crash his car? Because he didn't want to crash his truck.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because you didn't fuking cook to -.-

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Loner.

Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

Whats white and sticky fluff

thermodynamics?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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