ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

agp

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

9/11

lol

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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