a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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a man died

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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lol

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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