Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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9/11

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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