Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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hi

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How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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Why did the Kek Kick Ben? Cause Ben kicked Kek's Kik. KEKEKEK

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops