who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

thumb_up thumb_down +38

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +77

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops