No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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9/11

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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agp

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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Barack Obama.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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