What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

What happened after jimmy cheated on a test. Jimmy went home.

women's rights.

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

Three aliens land in the middle of New York City. There is a huge media story about the first extraterrestrial life to be discovered on Earth.

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

Knock knock Who's there? A ghost A ghost who?

Oh no! My life is ruined!

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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