What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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Good luck on your finals everyone!

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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Kathy Griffin.

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Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

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Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops