how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

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Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

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knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

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-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

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A married couple lies in bed, making out. They must really love each other.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Idk

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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how do you fix a family? Someone gives in

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

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Whats brown,looks like a.dike,and is a whore. Marcella

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I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? - Getting killed in the Holocaust. Whats worse than that? - Nothing.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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